What does one do when they are no longer on book tour?Beautiful things.
You…
1. Eat warm croissants wrapped around wedges of fresh cheese while sipping Baileys and coffee on the patio as the rain falls.2. Lazily page through Dharma Bums, Cat’s Cradle, and try to incorporate Vonnegut’s passé cynicism that “the mind reels” into every possible conversation, including one with your bewildered mother.3. Drive 110 miles per hour down I-95 to make a Circuit Court hearing date only to slam on brakes at the resulting gridlock of the most recent I-95 disaster. (At least this one did not catch an overpass on fire.) All of this while the radio stations conspire to play only bad 80’s music.
4. Appreciate intense intellectual debates over such universal themes as the appropriate thread count of one’s sheets, whether manchego is saltier than pecorino, and how cool it would be if Veronica Mars and Lilah (of Angel infamy) had their own TV show.
5. Fantasize about practicing law like Lilah after waiting in a courtroom for 2.5 hours to argue your precious five minute motion.
6. Realize your wholly forsaken gym has upgraded everything since you were last there…in 2003…but they still haven’t restocked your favorite Gatorade flavor. Can a girl get a lime Gatorade?
7. Also realize that the gym’s new personalized “17 flat screens on each treadmill fail to change your lack of motivation to run another step after .7 miles.
8. Somehow get sucked into a check kiting scheme. Never saw that coming from a random Craig’s list encounter.
9. Discover the brilliance of Elizabeth Bishop, Thomas Barbey, fresh laundry, and not living out of a suitcase.
10. Make up pointless lists while downing tea like it’s the elixir of life because the residual exhaustion has rendered one silly and stupid. And redundant.
Well, some of them are beautiful.
See ya’ll back on the road in three weeks. Until then, I’m reading, writing, litigating, and listening. Forward new artists of all varieties for inspiration.
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